Drash Shemot 5767:callings

Exodus 1:1-6:1

This week we start the book of Exodus and are introduced to the setup for the rest of the Torah. A Pharaoh who does not know Joseph arises and appealing to national security, has the Israelites enslaved. Things get worse. Pharaoh has the midwives try to kill all the newborn boys but they do not heed him. In response Pharaoh then decides to kill all male newborns by drowning, though one baby escapes this by being sent down the river, ending up living in the palace, until he murders an Egyptian task master. The slave who this guy saves rewards him by ratting him out. To escape Pharaoh’s anger, this man flees to Midian where he finds a bride, becomes a shepherd and has a rather interesting conversation with a burning bush. This man is of course Moses. And this week is really his story.

After his fleeing from Egypt, Moses begins a new life with a wife, a son, extended family and a flock of sheep. Yet things change for him, and such an idyllic life is about to get very complicated:

4. And when the Lord saw that he turned aside to see, God called to him out of the midst of the bush, and said, Moses, Moses. And he said, Here am I. 5. And he said, Do not come any closer; take off your shoes from your feet, for the place on which you stand is holy ground. 6. And he said, I am the God of your father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob. And Moses hid his face; for he was afraid to look upon God. 7. And the Lord said, I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt, and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters; for I know their sorrows; 8. And I have come down to save them from the hand of the Egyptians, and to bring them out of that land to a good and large land, to a land flowing with milk and honey; to the place of the Canaanites, and the Hittites, and the Amorites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites. 9. And therefore, behold, the cry of the people of Israel has come to me; and I have also seen the oppression with which the Egyptians oppress them. 10. Come now therefore, and I will send you to Pharaoh, that you may bring forth my people the children of Israel out of Egypt.

11. And Moses said to God, Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh, and that I should bring forth the people of Israel out of Egypt? [Ex. 3:4-11]

Ironically this week I start a translation class where we are translating the book of Exodus and the book of Jeremiah. And I found it very interesting the beginning of the book of Jeremiah.

4. Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying, 5. (K) Before I formed you in the belly I knew you; and before you came forth out of the womb I sanctified you, and I ordained you a prophet to the nations. 6. Then said I, Ah, Lord God! Behold, I cannot speak; for I am a child. 7. But the Lord said to me, Say not, I am a child; for you shall go to all to whom I shall send you, and whatever I command you, you shall speak. 8. Be not afraid of their faces; for I am with you to save you, said the Lord.

The parallels between Moses and Jeremiah, and particularly their responses interest me. Rabbinic commentary also parallel the two

Our Sages say: What is the meaning of ’But He is at one with Himself, and who can turn Him?’[Job 23:13] When He pronounces a decree on man, none can revoke it…. How long Jeremiah refused to prophesy, yet he was compelled to against his will; as it says: Say not: I am a child; for to whomsoever I shall send you, you will go [Jer. 1:7]. How reluctant was Moses to go on the divine mission, as it says: Send I pray You, by the hand of him whom You will send (Ex. IV, 13); yet in the end he was compelled to go, as it says: and Moses returned to Jethro his father in-law.

Divine will, according to these quotes does tell us what to do. We are set up to do certain things as was Moses and Jeremiah. Jeremiah’s path was set with a divine connection even before his birth. And yet Moses and Jeremiah both object to God’s will, complaining they are not good enough or credible enough to do that task. And in both cases God tells them differently, that the shortcomings of youth or poor speech is not enough to stop them on their mission, on their calling.

The word calling is an appropriate one as it is written God called to him out of the midst of the bush [Ex 3:4] Literally a calling is when God calls out to us and tells us where our life path is to take us, how we can help the world in our unique way. For Moses it was leading the people out of Egypt, For Jeremiah, It was warning Jews to change for the better, even if it was ultimately a hopeless cause. We as moderns do not hear voices out of burning bushes, and yet do we too have callings? How do we find them? And what do we do when we do?

Funny thing is, I haven’t a clue. Yet things have been strange lately and made me think about all this. Over and over again, the things in my world as a corporate health inspector break down or disappear. So I’ve been wondering lately if this is some kind of sign of where I’m going to go next in my life, toward my calling, whatever it is.

While I believe we have free will, I also paradoxically believe in callings, in the one path we each are destined to contribute to the word. We each have an attribute of our identity which isn’t our own will, but from some other more inherent source. One might call it genetics, nature, temperament, neuro-physiological connections – it doesn’t matter, it is still something we don’t control, yet defines how we live our life. It leads us towards some specific outcome that is particular to us. I believe such things come ultimately from the creator of the Dice of the Universe. Ha Kadosh Baruch Hu throws loaded dice every once in a while, just to stir things up. And in doing so God knows us even before we are formed in the belly, just like Jeremiah. God knows what our path is, yet we are free to choose to strive towards or away to that outcome. Thinking of this, I can’t help but think of the famed story of the Hasidic Rebbe Zuzya of Hanipol, who on his deathbed fretted not about being asked in the world to come why he was not more like Moses or Abraham, but fretted about being asked why he was not more like Zuzya.

I believe we all have a calling, and although it may not look like a burning thorn bush, we also have a moment where things clarify, when God calls us, just like Moses. If that moment is true, we also have in that same moment a realization of our inadequacy to the tasks necessary to get to that outcome. Yet, once we get to that moment we do it anyway, and our life is set on that path. More often than not it is not as significant as Moses’ calling – but it is our own. I think of the guy who was supposed to be a refrigerator repairman, yet he knew he wanted a lot more. I am here today because my dad knew his calling was more than charging evaporators with Freon in some Brooklyn Deli. After getting a PhD in Microbiology and creating an internationally recognized healthcare business, he continues to deliver on his calling, saving unknown lives in the process. When I think of what a calling does, that is my inspirational model, one I find myself still woefully inadequate in following.

But how does one get on that path of calling? We read this week:

2. And the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush; and he looked, and, behold, the bush burned with fire, and the bush was not consumed. 3. And Moses said, I will now turn aside, and see this great sight, why the bush is not burnt.

We really don’t know how long that bush is burning, or how long the angel waited for him; this great sight may have been there quite a while, maybe the beginning of creation. This is why it is interesting Moses say he will turn aside. The root word for turn aside in Hebrew, sur usually has a meaning of deviating or rebelling. For example you shall not turn aside to the right hand or to the left. (Deut. 5:29) or Take heed to yourselves, that your heart be not deceived, and you turn aside, and serve other gods, and worship them (Deut. 11:14) Transgressions often have to do with this word. Alternatively, the more common word for turn is shuv which has another connotation: turn back, or return to the path, hence t’ShUVah repentance. Why is the word more associated with transgression and not repentance used here?

The Midrash above quotes Job 23, ’But He is at one with Himself, and who can turn Him?’ where He refers to God. Here also the word for turn is shuv. We can also read the Hebrew as Now he who is with the One. To find that calling moment requires congruence with God, a knowing that God is there, and being able to see great wonders in the world. It is in that moment you can see burning bushes in everything around you, great miracles in the smallest thing. I am reminded of Jacob, when he said in a desolate desert with a stone for a pillow God was in this place and I, I did not know [Gen 28:16] When you get there and have that vision of your calling, then there is no turning back from it because you see where your calling fits in everything you do and thus everything you do is your calling. Jacob moved on from a homeless refugee headed towards Padan Aram to the leader of seventy children and grandchildren when he went down to Egypt. It is not the ordinary path of the majority but a unique one blazed and traversed by only you. That is why we read sur: We transgress against the common and conventional in society to be one with God by being our unique self, the one God fashioned even before we were formed in the womb.

Yet to be one with the creator requires us to acknowledge the One the way only we as Jews can – by following the mitzvot, by acknowledging the One in prayer like the Shema. Being Jewish is a big step in being unconventional as our ancestors found out time and time again. On the heels of the December season where both our identity shine in the light of hanukiot and pales in signs of assimilation like the Hanukkah Bush or the annual Christmas letter (which I refer to as the treif letter) it is good to see where we stand. Do we stand following a beat of the slaver drummers that are in Egypt, or do we play that beat of a different tof that is Miriam at the Red Sea? How we decide is by finding our calling, by being who we are, and seeing those burning bushes.