Parshat V’ethanan 5766 Deuteronomy 3:23-7:11
In this week's portion, Moses finishes his first speech, reminiscing what it was like at Sinai, and mentioning several times that he will not be going into the land because of the people's guilt. Moses also repeats a theme several times of observing the commandments of God and things will be good. If the people do not, then things will be bad. But he also tells them that even when things are bad, things can become good again, by going back to the mitzvot. Moses repeats the Ten Commandments, and then some words which we are all familiar with: (Deuteronomy 6:4-9)
Hear Oh, Israel, the Lord is God the Lord is one! Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul-life and all your might. These words which I command you today will be on your heart. You will teach them and speak of them when you dwell in your house, when going on the road, when you lie down and when you rise up. You will bind them for a sign on your hand, and they will be bindings between your eyes. You will write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
The Shema is one of the most fundamental passages in Judaism. So much so the the rabbis discuss how to interrupt it:
In the breaks (between sections of the Shema), one may give greeting out of respect and return greeting; in the middle [of a section] one may give greeting out of fear and return it. So R. Meir. Rabbi Judah says: in the middle one may give greeting out of fear and return it out of respect, in the breaks one may give greeting out of respect and return greeting to anyone. [M. Brachot 2:1]
One comment about this is found in the Gemara to this Mishnah
Our Rabbis taught: Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Up to this point concentration is required. So says R. Meir. Raba said: The halakah is as stated by R. Meir. [M.Brachot 13b]
Essentially the Rabbis discuss if there are times you can interrupt the recitation of the different passages of the Shema prayer service. Everyone agrees that between paragraphs, you can interrupt your recitation and say Shalom to someone, say a teacher, out of respect, and return such a Hello. But in between paragraphs, Rabbi Meir believes only out of fear for your life are you allowed to interrupt your prayer. Rabbi Judah believes that out of fear you are allowed to interrupt your prayer, and if a teacher or other person of respect, were to greet you in the middle of the Shema, then you interrupt yourself and return the greeting. Later in Gemara, the rabbis actually say other prayers like a partial Hallel, do not have this restriction of concentration, you can interrupt yourself wherever [13b].
The halakah underlines the intense concentration involving this section of liturgy. As we can tell from the comments of R. Meir, the absolutely key element is what we name the whole section of prayer, Shema, “Hear oh Israel.” This is where concentration is the most intense, including the covering of our eyes so we can not look at anything that might distract us. Yet why are these six words so intensely said?
One answer has been brewing in my mind for the last two months. As I noted in other drashes, I’m trying to get over my shyness in person to person contact by a variety of methods. Those with shyness or approach anxiety have scripts in our heads which tell us not to approach. For example, When I see someone or a small group of people I want to talk to (who I’ll call X) several voices or scripts immediately go off in my head. I might hear:
“What if X rejects me? I’ll fell embarrassed and hurt!”
“X is only going to say something that will hurt me”
“What would X see in me anyway?”
“What do I say to X to start a conversation?”
“It impolite or rude to start a conversation with X”
“I’ll be an interruption!”
In hearing these voices, I listen to them and heed them, because I believe them to be true. Yet, I only believe them to be true because there is no evidence to the contrary. Had there been other scripts in my head saying something else I might listen to them as well. However, I have no problem with standing in front of 200 people and giving a presentation. Somewhere back there in my mind there is probably a similar script for public speaking that says “If I make a mistake while speaking, people will laugh at me” yet there is another stronger script that says “If anything goes wrong, I’ll make sure everyone has a big laugh about it.” It is that second script which continually gets me accolades as an “entertaining speaker.” That second script is so ingrained; I don’t even think before I react, I just turn a problem or mistake into a joke.
Thinking about the difference in my public and private speaking skills, I see this difference clearly. But how did I beat my anxiety over public speaking? Going back to when I was learning public speaking almost twenty years ago, I think that answer is twofold. One was of course just doing public speaking. Thinking back to some of those first experiences, I do remember how scared I was. I was literally shaking in my boots. At the time I was teaching computer skills, and my students were even more scared of the computer than I was of them. I found out that if you showed any weakness or nervousness they would exploit it and try to hurt you just so they would feel better about their own lack of skills. My first few training sessions were pure hell.
But not long after that, I got my first new car, complete with a cassette deck. It was that cassette deck which was the other part of the answer. I bought for myself an album of self-esteem materials. The cassettes were stories the presenter ripped off inspiration stories from any other source he could find. He strung them together as a motivational presentation for five and a half cassettes. But that last side of the sixth cassette was really what I would listen to over and over again. It consisted of the presenter merely saying a number of statements, such as.
I am good and I am lovable
I am confident and I am competent
People like me.
What I do makes a difference
This was my first exposure to affirmations. I listened to that half hour affirmation tape for hours as I would travel the long distances to clients back then. In retrospect I do believe that my nervousness dissipated because of listening and repeating the affirmations on those tapes out loud over and over again. With both practice and a better sense of confidence, I was eventually able to become a rather good trainer and public speaker. The affirmations took all of the negative scripts and gave them something to compete with. By saying the same thing over and over again, I eventually believed it. Indeed I believed it so much, it overpowered the fear mongering scripts.
About two months ago, I thought of this while trying to find ways to get me to break my cycle of approach anxiety. So for the last two months, I’ve been using affirmations again. Keeping up with technology I’ve recorded them as mp3 files on my iPod, listening to them in my car or when I walk somewhere, repeating the scripts that I should remember when I want to talk to someone I have not been introduced to. I go to sleep to them and wake up to them, two times where the brain absorbs such stuff well.
Affirmations have requirement to be a good affirmation. One requirement is an affirmation must be short, in order to remember them better. Another is that they must be completely in the affirmative. Negation words like not and never are ignored by the subconscious. The ears may hear “I will never eat a piece of chocolate cake for a snack” but the subconcious hears “I will eat a piece of chocolate cake for a snack”, re-enforcing the behavior we are trying to get rid of. For a dieting affirmation, a better one would be I will eat a carrot or an apple when I need a snack, giving the positive behavior that one is to do.
Some have said that the Shema is a mantra, which gets you into a meditative mood. I don’t believe this, because the repetition of mantra must be a lot more frequent and rhythmic than we do saying the Shema twice a day. Yet the six-word Shema is a short positive remark, said at the two times when our brain is the most receptive to such information, “when you lie down and when you rise up.” We are to think about it “while you go on the road,” when the mind enters a trance like state from travel. And we are to give ourselves physical symbols of those words, “as frontlets (i.e. tefillin) between your eyes and on the door posts of your house and your gates.” Such symbols are triggers to subconsciously recall the words of the Shema. Through every door we pass, we instantly remember the Shema. When I pass a mezuzah and see the Hebrew letter Shin, even though I know better, I always think of the word Shema, not Shaddai that it really represents.
The Shema is the ultimate Jewish affirmation, set up for us to remember and integrate not only into our own lives but into the lives of our descendants. We remember we are a spiritual nation, and that the message is for all of us, we remember God, and that God is ONE. Over and over again we repeat those words. Even those who can’t tell an aleph from an ayin can say it in both Hebrew and English. Others, Like Maimonides have tried other affirmations, such as his 13 principles but none have taken so hard and deep in every Jew than the Shema. The reason for the intensity surrounding those six words it they are such an important affirmation to integrate and thus be jewishly connected to God.
This portion is always read just after the spiritually darkest day of the Jewish calendar, the 9th of Av. Even though there are many other passages in this and the Haftorah that lead us to comfort, it is this six words affirmation of God that is the most comforting.
Now go stick that on your iPod.
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